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Disciple of Nagash

Oldblood
Staff member
Feb 12, 2008
27,732
An interesting topic in my eyes.

Last Saturday whilst out drinking I witnessed an attack, a man getting kicked whilst down by other men.

I stepped in, the fight stopped and I performed first aid.

However some of the responses I received after speaking to people really shocked me.

My missus said I was stupid, that I could have been attacked.

Someone at work said I could have been knifed and he wouldn't have done anything.

Someone else said at work they wouldn't have done the first aid as there was blood (which I got on my hands) and there is AIDS etc (thought I explained with no open cuts on my hands it is very unlikely to catch it even if they had it).

A lot of people will not get involved.....yet I can't just walk away like that. I couldn't just see someone else getting beaten up, possibly killed. Likewise I couldn't just leave someone bleeding out, especially when I know I am a trained first aider. If that means getting bloody so be it.

What would you do? Am I being reckless?

I can't help think that is more people did what I consider to be the right thing, and step in, then perhaps the world would not be the cold place I feel it is at times.
 

Lord Sathir

Skeleton
Jan 31, 2012
70
I think what you did was the right thing, I personally have never experienced what you have but just standing and watching is something I probably would not do, I don't know anything about first aid.. but I will atleast try to help the guy to get to a first-aid post or something similair.

Don't worry you did the right thing and that was very brave of you.
 

Duke Danse Macabre

The Duke
True Blood
Sep 16, 2010
3,696
Sunderland, United Kingdom
This has happened to most.

I remember this when in college.

Was out for lunch one of the first days of the new term, 16 and bright grumbling as the summer holidays were over.
Anyway I'm a big guy even then I was 6ft and a mighty 6.4 now which was the reason me and one lad got talking in class as he was the smallest, decide to pop down the chippy.

Anyway half way there a 20 year old bloke jumps off a BMX and walks across to us shouting to the lad are you this person, mid answer he punches him in the face decking him and starts to stamp on his head.
A little 16 year old 4ft 6 epileptic lad.
So I jump in and pull him off, he goes to run at him again and I get between them so he goes for me.
Got 2 good ringing shots to the face which split my eyebrow open. (soft tissue and he was wearing those huge bulky gold tacky rings)
So I get in close and get in in a headlock forcing him down to one knee all the while he is hammering on the back of my head screaming at me.
At this point I risk a look up to see where my mate is... the little b*stard had legged it.
So left with no choice at this point we start screaming at each other and I eventually make myself clear as he is getting tired and turning purple I'll let him go if he feck the hell off.... Which luckily he did as his mate was looking on and at this point a crowd of onlooking motorists were stopping to see what was happening.

Anyway I headed back to college and spoke to the staff about what had happened and forced to go to hospital for legal reasons in case I have a concussion.
But not once did people say I should not of done it, sure I got a few people giving me looks as I came in blood dripping from my chin. (soft tissue bleeds like a mother)

Nope my new class instantly warmed to me and my lecturer kept calling me a hero.



The fact is lots of people are only out for themselves or are to afraid of danger to act, all it takes for these swines to get away with things like this is to do nothing.
Never know when it could be you in need of help.
I don't think twice about getting involved, I rather risk my own well being than just watch something like that happen.

Good work DoN, I'm proud of you. :thumbsup:
Not many people will step into help another even if they know them, allot less if its a stranger.

Also you now know where some people at work stand if you even need their help.
Aids is the worst excuse I have ever heard.
 

Johnny-Crass

Vampire Ancient
True Blood
Jan 25, 2012
6,633
California
I have jumped in to alot of fights in my time, a little bit because I like to fight and partly because 3+ against 1 is never fair. I commend you and I for one would never walk away.
 

Shadow14_8

Ghoul
Aug 24, 2009
117
Hell yes you were reckless!! But I would have done the same. 2 types of people, some hate injustice and abuse and will risk themselves to do the right thing, and the rest ignore and mind their own business like its never gonna catch up with them. Wish we had a few more of the former the world would be a better place me thinks...
 

TMS

Moderator
Staff member
True Blood
Nov 26, 2008
4,662
Sweden
I'd commend you for doing what you did, DoN, and I like to hope that I would've done the same if I were in that situation. (Fortunately) I've never had to find out how I would react, but I still believe that it's important to make calculated decisions before jumping into anything. In the situation you describe your intervention made all the difference, but I'd be very hesitant of approaching a larger group of people alone. There's been case reports of 10+ people abusing a single individual, circling around and taking turns with kicking and punching. I sure hope I'll never come to witness anything like that.

There's also other factors to consider, such as your partner and children who depend on you. I don't think this is an easy question to answer, but in my opinion you did the right thing. I'm sure that many others around you think the same as well. :thumbsup:
 

desfer

Necromancer
Jun 13, 2010
801
Attiki, Atthens
Well, it has happened to me too. Once i was in a train and there was an as**ole who tried to hit and old man cause he told him to lower the volume of his music...I grabbed his hand and pushed him back. He started hitting me...poor guy. Everyone i told the story to reacted the way you described. It seems that when you look at the facts as a 3rd person you think it's reckless and say you wouldn't do it, but when you live it it's different. I am sure i will react the same way if something like this happens again. Not because i like to play the "hero", but as Shadow wrote i hate seeing others abusing ppl, especially children and old men!
 

Unanswered

Ghoul
Feb 8, 2011
120
California
sadly there are studies on this issue, if a situation goes down and there are plenty of people around the chance of them stepping in is vastly smaller than if there are only a handful of people nearby. you ALWAYS have to be the one to help, chances are the person in danger might get severely injured or killed and you cannot count on the average passer-by to do anything about it. Having been in this situation a few times, i like to think of it as paying it forward, hopefully if i ever get attacked and can't defend myself i would wish for someone like you to help.

The mark of a great man is in his actions, DoN that was an altruistic thing you did, and I respect you the more for it.
 

hairyjeff

Crypt Horror
May 10, 2011
579
Although I understand your ladies' worry, what you did was absolutely the right thing. It is sadly a reflection of the world as it has developed, that some people will not go to anothers aid. I have intervened myself, but been told I was wrong. I know I'm a lot older, and grew up with a different social ethos, but I will never let bullies and cowards run amok with innocent victims. It's cost me blood, bruises and and a psych test , but I will go to my grave knowing that we are the better people, and be happy with that.
 

Zephyr

Master Necromancer
True Blood
Mar 3, 2008
2,522
Rotterdam
Interesting topic. Said it before and I will say it again; you did a good deed there.
Yes it could have been dangerous but if everyone thinks that way then what?
There is an interesting psychological thing going on as well in those situations; if only one person steps forwards others might follow suit or could be ordered to do so. It is basically the herd mentality at work and an alpha needs to step up and take charge.

Also there is always something you can do to help without using physical prowess. Most people feel they are too weak to matter. I know I could not step in physically but I will do all I can. Just calling for help is at least better than ignoring it or standing there dumbstruck.
I have been on the receiving end a lot of times and I would scream to folks passing by " for the love of G-d, call the cops!". I always had to crawl to them myself. If I still could. For some reason being handicapped simply means you are an easier target...not somebody you will spare because they are already crippled. Just last week I got kicked to the ground and I had to try and scramble away and get inside a store because on the streets nobody will lift a finger.

I will never ever walk away on somebody like that and if I do it will be to get help. There is a difference between intervening or diving in front of a drive-by obviously but if you use common sense you can make good split-second decisions and assess the situation.
I honestly wish there were more people like you DoN.
 

Disciple of Nagash

Oldblood
Staff member
Feb 12, 2008
27,732
After reading this thread you all make me feel like there are decent people in the world. To hear you all come back and say you would do or have done the same thing encourages me that perhaps things aren't as bad as I think they are.

Thank you for all you praise as well, though I don't feel like I deserve it. Someone at worked asked why I did it, and my response was "because it was the right thing to do". The idea of leaving someone there.....it's just not something I can do. I only did what I would hope that most other people would do, and after seeing this thread it seems there are others out there that would. Xd

I also should note I am also trained in both martial arts and first aid, so that does make it more viable to do it. That said it was still a shock to be holding a man's bloody head together, and I was very concerned about the lack of proactive response from the nearby police. I had to actually tell them to bring me their first aid kit from their car!

I suppose I could just not live my life walking away from things like that, even though someday I could come off worse. It's a worrying thought considering I do have a family. But that is something so deeply rooted in me that I don't think I could or would actually want to change that. I also don't want my children to grow up thinking that leaving others who are hurt to protect themselves is the best course of action.

@ Zephyr - I am disgusted to hear how you have been treated at times. I really wish there was something could do help you, nothing pisses me off worse that bullies who pick on those less fortunate than themselves.
 

Archean

Ghoul
Sep 16, 2011
132
With this, in my opinion notions of right and wrong and too simple and fail to label the actions correctly. Right and wrong are too absolute, and hence, utterly useless descriptive words for most circumstances.

Sadly sometimes the so called "right" thing to do isn't always the smartest thing for yourself, but in the heat of the moment, instinct tells you to act.

Jumping in to aid friends and injustice is natural in my opinion, only those on the outside and those who don't care or those who have never felt the inner desire to stop an act of violence, judge your actions as "wrong". Wrong for who? Wrong for you? Those same people would probably label you a coward for not helping....

In those moments you simply don't think (hmmmm I shouldn't help, I might get Aids), or about your own safety or risks of getting stabbed. You just act and you shouldn't be ashamed of action. Plenty of people in this world wish they could have acted, could have changed a situation, but they didn't or couldn't and hence regret things.

I'm a big fan of the able helping the unable. It's probably the closest thing to being the "right" thing to do in this world.
 

Zephyr

Master Necromancer
True Blood
Mar 3, 2008
2,522
Rotterdam
This thread does actually restore my faith in humanity. Good to read that when most people ask why you guys ask why the hell not?
 

hairyjeff

Crypt Horror
May 10, 2011
579
Like DoN, I'm trained in martial arts and combat, and it does shed a slightly different light on the situation when you run into it. The scum who attack guys like Zephyr are animals. No, I'll correct myself there.The difference between a human and a beast is the instinct to assist a fellow creature in need. This means some animals are more human than some people; but we should be proud of our humanity, even though we may be outnumbered. So, I feel those attackers are beasts, and less than animals. And if any of them read this( highly unlikely, I know) and don't like it, well, come and find me.
 

Grish

Liche
True Blood
Oct 11, 2007
5,319
Winnipeg, MB
Honestly, likely I would ahve used words but wouldn't have jumped in.

Gang violence is common here, and every weekend on the news there's stabbings, beatings, attacks of all kinds. Many times the victims themselves are gang members and refuse to get involved. So if it was occuring in my city, in the bad area, likely I would NOT step in. I would call the police immediately and let the attackers know they're on their way and the longer they stick around the longer their faces will be in my memory (all while being ready to leg it).

While there are many admirable sentiments here, and if if true I applaud it, but is everyone on this forum the exception? Gang attacks are dangerous situations, and you're kidding yourself if it's not. There is the possibility to be seriously wounded.

I don't know how things in the UK are, but concealed weapons here are the norm. Any one of them could have a gun.

It depends where it's occuring and with who. If it's a bar fight, I'd step in. If it looks like a gang fight, no way in hell. Generally, violence is directed at people they know. No one is willing to risk jail to just beat up someone they don't even know. There is almost always a goal; robbery, retaliation, gang politics.
 

Zephyr

Master Necromancer
True Blood
Mar 3, 2008
2,522
Rotterdam
@ Grish I said it kind of tongue in cheek with "drive-by" but obviously there is a dividing line between being a decent person that steps in and simply suicidal because you know it to be dangerous. IMO in gang-fights there are also not really innocent people suffering, just a bunch of idiot thugs. Simply call the cops and be done with it.
 

Sanai

Stylish Deviant
True Blood
Oct 30, 2009
5,193
Behind Darvy
I would probably step in, as I cannot stand injustice of any kind, the risk to myself really does not matter anyway.
 

Raizi

Vampire Thrall
Oct 16, 2011
999
I think Faithless nails it in one of their songs:

"Inaction is a weapon of mass destruction."

You did the right thing there. I have once been the victim of a person who was in a bar just looking for a fight. I was trying to reason with him as he was telling me and my mate that we were talking too loudly. (which we were, we've had a few pints and were having a friendly argument about Wikileaks, we love a good debate, but it often gets too loud.)

While my friend was getting us fresh pints, I walked to the man who had came to our table earlier, as he was standing just two metres from our table even though the bar was almost empty. I kindly explained to him that we were good friends who just love to debate and argue about things in a civilized manner and apologized to him if we had been too loud. I also pointed out, that the bar was almost empty, so if our talking disturbed him, he might find the tables on the opposite side of the establishment more quiet.

Well, the result was that he got a sucker punch on my jaw when I was pointing him the empty tables, I never saw anything. The next thing I know I'm on the floor spitting blood and the man has vanished. I literally lost about 30 seconds in which time he had dragged me to the other side, over 15 metres across the floor and banged my head to the darts board. I got really lucky in this as I had only a slight concussion but no broken teeth or any permanent damage.

No one of the other customers in the restaurant lifted a finger. The man was never caught. My friend tried to come in between us, but the man tossed him aside as he fled the bar.
 

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