Unlikely things to hear in a ___

[Unanswered]

"Well soldier you have passed every test, except one...(the sergeant drops his robes) i need you...to PAINT ME!"

unlikely things to hear at a lady Gaga concert

 

[Harland]

"Now, in a dress made solely out of linen and cotton, it's Lady Gaga!"

Unlikely things to hear on Disney Channel.

By the way, look at what my search turned up: This is what a dress made of 3000 cow nipples looks like

 

[Bravo_10]

"Now...witness the full power of the dark side of the Force!!!"

Unlikely things to hear at an anime/manga convention!

 

[Raizi]

"Surprisingly, no-one cosplayed Naruto."

Unlikely things to hear during an inquisitional 'questioning' about the practice of witchcraft.

 

[Unanswered]

"You stand guilty of using lavender seedlings to possess this young man!...oh so it helps the male libido you say...Hmm ill just take some of those"


Unlikely things to hear on Pokemon

 

[Sweeney Todd]

"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about Pikachu's power level?"

"It's OVER 9000!!!"

Unlikely things to hear in a reality show

 

[The Archivist]

"And once again the contestants have survived without any emotional tantrums..."

Unlikely things to hear in Los Alamos [go wiki]

 

[Chaos Zombie]

"god, i wish i was in los angles"

unlikely things to hear in the titanic

 

[whtdwrf11]

"I hope we hit an iceberg"

Unlikely things to hear in a telemarketer call

 

[Harland]

"Hello, have you received the latest genital warts?"

Unlikely things to hear at school

 

[The Archivist]

"The state is putting its money where its mouth is and making schools into mini-democracys."

Unlikly things to hear in communist manifestos

 

[Chaos Zombie]

"i protest capitalismm is way-:silent: 'gunshot in distance'"

unlikely thing to hear i a feminist association meetingerv:

 

[Unanswered]

"so if we just keep pretending to hate men, it makes them want us even more right?"

unlikely things to hear in a public bathroom

 

[Harland]

"damn it's clean in here."

Unlikely things to hear in a restaurant.

 

[The Archivist]

"Waiter! This man is trying to spray me with bullets!"

Unlikely things to hear on an intercontinental express train

 

[whtdwrf11]

"Waiter there isn't enough hair in my soup"

Unlikely things to hear in a Games Workshop board meeting.

Edit: lol so what is the actual next thing me and the archivist basically posted at the same exact time.

 

[Raizi]

"OK, guys. Our collaboration with Sanrio has entered a new phase. Now that we have pushed the prize tag of our own minis though the roof we will rewrite the rules for all the units and make them crap again. Then we will introduce the new Hello Kitty Army with it's own core, special and rare choices, give them invincible stat lines and keep their prizes to a bargain. We will get millions of new players, especially from asia and profit until we burst."

Unlikely things to hear in a Sanrio board meeting.

 

[Unanswered]

"we need a grown up, edgier hello kitty...maybe a movie called 'the kitty with the dragon tattoo'"

Unlikely things to hear from Sean Connery

 

[Harland]

"I shaved off my moustache"

unlikely things to hear from a hat.

 

[The Archivist]

"MK5 BATTLE HAT ONLINE AND PREPARED TO CHOP SOME TROUSER LEG!"

Unlikely things to hear in an intercontinental express train.

 

[Raizi]

"Please fasten your seatbelts, we will be leaving the tracks shortly and the rest of the journey will be an off-road experience."

Unlikely thing to hear on Christmas Eve.

 

[spineyrequiem]

'Due to repair work on the North Pole line, there is a bus replacement service for Santa's sleigh.'

Unlikely things to hear at a Justin Bieber concert.

 

[Raizi]

"This next song is from my upcoming Christmas-album: Santa Claus lives in Korvatunturi, fools!"

Unlikely things to hear in the elves' labour union meeting at Korvatunturi.

[Edit: Try hitting 'North Pole' and 'Korvatunturi' to Google and compare which one has more santa in the pics.]

 

[Harland]

"I think every toy should be a variant of the dildo!"


Unlikely things to here in a Zombie Apocalypse.

 

[Count Darvaleth]

"Relax, I'm not hungry; I ate some brains already."

Unlikely things to hear in a Schubert Song Cycle.